I kinda sinned tonight.

So, it was 10:30 pm and I've decided on a whim to go to the local all night Meijer's. I had borrowed my father's van as my car is going through some work thanks to a mishap that I still can't write about yet. So, anyway, my father has a handicapped parking sticker that he got after some injury. I can't remember what. Well, it hasn't expired and it was in his car, so I used it. I think the Meijer parking lot is creepy at night and I don't like walking through it, especially at 10:30 at night. So, I took a handicapped spot, ran in, bought my items and left. I really don't feel guilty as I didn't do it out of laziness. You know me. You've gone shopping with me and know I don't mind a long walk in a parking lot. But, this was different. I did it because I felt safer parking closer. What do you think? Big transgression?

Mellow.

So, there I am, relaxing, listening to, well, relaxation music. Can't remember the name of the song but for this purpose, we'll call it Chakra Healing Chant Number 6. So, the song is going along quite well. I'm relaxing more and more. All of a sudden, I hear the croaking of frogs. Whoever arranged Chakra Healing Chant Number 6 for some reason thought that the croaking of frogs would be relaxing. Well, they were wrong. I don't find frogs relaxing and I certainly don't find the unmelodious croaking of frogs relaxing. Next time I feel the need to listen to relaxation music, I believe I will fast-forward over Chakra Healing Chant Number 6.

It's almost as bad Chakra Healing Chant Number 11, which, right when one is at one's most relaxed, one is jolted out of said relaxation by the loud peal of a gong.

Whoever is arranging the current choices of relaxation music needs to realize that the pealing of a gong is quite startling, especially to the person to who uses relaxation music to help them fall asleep.

I have nothing more to say on this subject. It's just an observation.

Tomayto, Tomahto

One word of advice to those of you who plan to pickle or "put up" as the traditionalists say green tomatoes. Green tomatoes are not a breed unto themselves. They are red tomatoes that have not yet gained their color. So, if someone, let's say their name was Zagetstone, were to buy a bag of green tomatoes during the week to pickle on the weekend, think of the shock Zagestone felt when she opened the bag of green tomatoes, eager to pickle them, but only to realize they had turned red. I...I mean Zagetstone was thoroughly disappointed. So, the word of advice is: When you get the bright idea to pickle green tomatoes, time is of the essence. Don't wait. Make haste and pickle the moment you get home from the market with your glorious bounty of green tomatoes. Don't put yourself through the anguish that Zagetstone faced.

Star

Pictorial essay.

I should have worn my lucky necklace.

Before I left for work this morning, it crossed my mind to wear my lucky necklace, the one I used to wear when I had to take a test in school, and the one I try to remember to wear when I have to drive long distances on the freeway. The thought to wear my lucky necklace wasn't strong enough and I decided against it. Here's what happened because of my inability to listen to my intuition:

1) I was denied coffee at a coffee shop and forced to drink espresso instead. They said that's the way they make their Cafe Americano drinks and they wouldn't budge, even though I told them I'd rather have coffee. How hard would have it been to put coffee in my cup instead of espresso? Why did I want coffee instead of espresso, you may ask. Well, dear reader, the espresso's bitterness forces me to add sugar to my drink, while I drink coffee without sugar. I was trying to be healthy by avoiding the sugar in my drink, to no avail.

2) I did the stupidest of stupid things. I can't say what I did yet, because we've yet to figure out if I'm upset or not. Three of you already know what I did including one of you who was witness to my stupidity (you now need a nickname Aimee.) Let's just say that no one was was injured and although it's 1:24 in the am, I just employed some duct tape to correct the problem until I consult with a professional.

See, what should be understood is that as a whole, today was great. I had lunch with a friend. Went to a concert with another friend. Bumped into the Breakfast Czar and was able to hang with her this evening. All in all, balancing everything out, more things went right today than wrong.

It's been a long time.

Sorry it's been so long since I posted. Things I'm thinking about:

1) Why do I keep seeing the bendy girl from yoga class around town? I see her at Whole Foods. I see her at the movies. She's everywhere. I wonder when she finds time to practice being as bendy as Gumby.

2) Pumpkin gnocchi is easy to make and it tastes good too...

3) So is/does gazpacho.

4) Why is restaurant Greek salad dressing better than the dressing recipe I have tried to make from an authentic Greek cookbook? I've never been satisfied with homemade Greek dressing. What kind of magic do Greek chefs put in their salad dressing. It irks me to no end.

5) Do you think the neighbors thought I was weird as I was lying on the ground this morning on an old purple towel, taking photos of all of the mushrooms that have sprung up in the lawn?

6) How do you stuff a cocker spaniel in a purse to sneak him into the movie theatre? The woman at the movies today did. I guess her dog is very Gumbyish, just like Bendy Yoga Girl. I mean, we're not talking about a chihuahua here. We're talking about a cocker spaniel.

7) Let's talk for a minute about our olfactory systems. I pass a garden shop every day, walking to the omelet shop for an omelet. Walking to the omelet shop for a cup of coffee. Walking to the omelet shop in hopes that they'll stop selling "healthy" desserts like fruit juice-sweetened brownies and start selling something decadent. Anyway, as I said, I pass the garden shop on these trips. I always detect the scent of...something. I'm not sure what. It's not boxwood, but it's similar. It's not an herb, but it's similar. No one else walking with me to the omelet shop has every detected this aroma. And, I even went in the garden shop and asked them what smells so good in front of their store. They thought I was crazy. They said there is nothing special in front giving off a pleasing aroma. But, I smell it every time I pass the place. I guess I will never know. But why am I the only one who detects this scent???????

8) I have a problem that I wonder if the Chocolate Whisperer can solve. I wonder if perhaps she can detect different tones of chocolate just by looking a piece. I have acquired an abundance of these Special Snooty Hershey Chocolate squares. They have individual names like Aruba Chocolate or Flanders Chocolate. But knowing that doesn't help me figure out if the piece I select is bitter chocolate, milk chocolate or my favorite: semi-sweet dark. Help, Chocolate Whisperer. Save the day.